So finally found out what J wanted to have a 'significant talk' with me about. I think he should make some recordings : "Lecture sister about getting married" "Lecture sister about financial instability" "Lecture sister about time management" and this way, he could just email me and ask me to play tape #3485. I know he does it because he cares, but he makes it sound like I'm petulantly turning away suitors who aren't good enough for me. It's like he wants me to treat marriage like a political campaign. I should go out, canvass the population for my demographic and then express interest in being elected and share the reasons everyone should want me to be the candidate. Grrr.