political snark

"President Bush announced he has a five-point strategy for getting out of Iraq. Points six through 10 will be handled by the Kerry administration." --David Letterman

"President Bush's campaign is now attacking John Kerry for throwing away some of his medals to protest the Vietnam War. Bush did not have any medals to throw away, but in his defense he did have all his services records thrown out." --Jay Leno

"President Bush says in the last month he has created 300,000 new jobs. Yeah, they're called Kerry campaign workers." --Craig Kilborn

"Is it me or is Bush going everywhere Kerry goes? So far in the past week, President Bush has followed John Kerry to Davenport, Iowa; New Mexico; Las Vegas; Los Angeles; and he follows him to Portland, Oregon. ...The only place he never followed John Kerry was Vietnam." --Jay Leno

"President Bush said that the people who are attacking our forces in Iraq are getting more and more desperate because we're making so much progress. So just remember, the worse it gets, the better it is." --Jay Leno

"As of yesterday, the Bush administration still hadn't found the source of the White House leak that outed a woman as a CIA operative. To recap, here are the things President Bush can't find: The source of the leak, weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Osama bin Laden, the link between Saddam and Osama bin Laden, the guy who sent the anthrax through the mail, and his butt with two hands and a flashlight." --Tina Fey

"The White House now has disputed allegations by members of the House Intelligence Committee that President Bush went to war with Iraq based on vague intelligence. Of course he did: EVERYTHING Bush does is based on vague intelligence." --Jay Leno

"Bush is smart. I don't think that Bush will ever be impeached, 'cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W. is immune from scandal. Because, if George W. testifies that he had no idea what was going on, wouldn't you believe him?" --Jay Leno

[email from trtle]

hate hate haaaaaaate

Stupid. Fucking. Video Professor.

Yes, I'm an idiot for doing the trial-thingie. But. GOD. I hate fucking companies that try to trick you out of your money by sneakily charging your credit card. I signed up for a free lesson to be mailed to me on Excel. I know I need to boost up my Excel/Access skills. So for the price of shipping, they offered to send the Excel lesson as part of a promotion. (No, this was not something I found via SPAM, I'm not completely retarded).

So they mailed the discs and I put them away for another time when I might want to quickly learn Excel.

Found out today that my bank account was overdrawn due to a SEVENTY FUCKING DOLLAR charge for a third disc they mailed me for 'review' that they expected me to mail back. I'm sure the fine print on their website made note of this, to cover their asses. And I should have known better. It's not like they made that facet obvious in any way. They know most people aren't going to notice that. But christ on a fucking pony, did they think no one would notice a $70 charge?

So MAD. Called and complained to my bank. The guy was very nice and said this happens all the time--especially with this company. So hopefully they'll refund my money back--and I'm going to have to make a trip to the post office to return the fucking disc today. And I'm pissed about that.

PISSED PISSED PISSED.

And this wouldn't have been such a catastrophe if my contract-company had direct deposit. If my check had been in the bank, I would have still been mad about the charge and had to deal with it, but my account status would be fine. They haven't even cut the checks yet because the woman who does that took some time off to get married. I don't begrudge her the time off, but christ on a fucking pony. I know it's a small company, and I love the people. BUT CHRIST. How do people fucking get their bills paid on time?

I need to get the $200 OB owes me. And also the $160 that my last contract job owes me. But until I do, I'm sitting here $14 in the hole and fuming pissed.