(no subject)

[verbicide]

Miss manners would be pleased.

(Link from Sarah. And I have to agree with the article. Manners aren't given the importance they should.)

Comments

[rolypolypony.livejournal.com]

I am being forced to friend you because you have the cutest cat :)

(also, I've seen you commenting in other friend's journals and you seem neat :) )

[verbicide.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm being forced to friend you back because I have no resistance against nice people :)

(Plus, you hang with a pretty cool crowd.)

[rolypolypony.livejournal.com]

Yes, yes I do ;)

[rimrunner.livejournal.com]

I have to admit, over the weekend, people really seemed to appreciate it when I treated them politely and with respect.

Years of customer service, and now librarianship, have more or less hard-wired this behavior. However, there's another cool thing about good manners that that article didn't really touch on: you can tell people to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.

Also, Mr. Darcy often complains that he doesn't know how to talk to people he doesn't know, or act in social situations. Then he asks me what good etiquette is. "Well, for one thing," I tell him, "you could stop worrying about that stuff."

[verbicide.livejournal.com]

Having worked many years in customer service myself, particularly as a network tech, people were not only appreciative of being treated kindly, they were often surprised. Which I think is sad.

Your advice to Mr. Darcy makes a good point. There's no sense in worrying too much about that stuff; if you have good basic manners, your natural reaction will probably be fine. But I admit I wish more people would think about whether their behavior is socially appropriate.

[mattguy.livejournal.com]

Bah. Old rules.

It seems like most of the non-dining rules articulated here aren't meant to create politeness but meant to ensure that kids don't act like kids. Which is fine if you're into deference for no reason other than age (note: frat pledges aren't allowed to sit when a bro is in the room; are you sure you want to haze your kids?), but I guarantee you that strict rules when adults are around means breaking more rules when they're not; what better way to get back at mom and dad for running their house like a military academy than to go get stoned and screw little Sally under the bleachers?

This isn't to say that a firm handshake and a smile aren't a good thing to teach kids, but not leaning on a wall when waiting in line? It gets fucking hot here, and if I've been lugging my laptop around all day you can be damn sure I'll lean on whatever's tall enough. Arbitrary rules for no other reason that maintaining a pretentious 19th century air of sophistication do nothing but promote snobbery and stifle the urge in a seven year old to play.

Also, I'll wear flipflops to the White House until the the president stops discussing foreign policy on a mountain bike.