verbicide | mowr mowr

I don't want to do a presentation.
I don't want to talk in front of a group of people.
I don't care that they're not scary to me anymore.
I'll get up there and I'll disregard my notes.
I'll get up there and forget half a dozen critical points.
I'll get up there and accidentally catch eyes with someone and that'll flummox me.
I'll get up there and desperately have to pee or vomit.
I'll get up there and I'll DIE.

*cries*

jeff_nw promises that I didn't appear to be a spaz during my presentation during first quarter's dreadful thingie, but a) he LIES and b) I was hiding behind a computer thingie and talking about web dev which is where I eat lunch, so was less scary than this.

mowr mowr mowr.

Public speaking is BAD. Very very BAD.

Argh! OMFG am total spaz!!!!

I know they'll be nice about it.
I know no one is going to throw things at me.
I know they'll applaud no matter how badly I suck.

It doesn't matter! We haaaates it! It burrnsss us! We wants to put out their eyeses so they can'ts looks at us!

*hisss* *feral growl* *raised hackles*

*pause*

Wow do I feel bad for the poor miserable telemarketer who just called.

Her: Hi! This is Jackie with BlahCorp. How are yo-
Me: ARGGGRGHHHHHHHH!!!! *slams phone down*

Eeek. Time to go. Now. *wail*